Sunday, August 16, 2009
It's not like it used to be
I have glorified the role of alcohol in motherhood. I know, I'm exaggerating. But wine did get me through the crying out phase with Amelia. I didn't get plastered. Just a glass of wine a night to relax after a long day of work and more work. I write about this because I just read an article in the New York Times today about author of funny Mommy books and fellow blogger Stephanie Wilder-Taylor, who announced to her readers last week that she has quit drinking. This after she wrote "Sippy Cups Are Not for Chardonnay" and "Naptime is The New Happy Hour". Wilder-Taylor says she realized that alcohol had become a crucial part of her motherhood survival. She had to have it every night. Knowing this is not the example she wanted to give her daughters, she quit.
While reading the article, I obviously took a look at my own habits and realized, I DON'T HAVE TO QUIT. I don't need the one glass of wine a night to get through motherhood. I don't break out in hives if there is no wine in the house. In fact, motherhood has had a sobering effect on me.
After nine months of no alcohol at all, I can't have more than 2 drinks before feeling nice and loose. A great feeling to have when you are out at night with your friends but not when you have to come home to a baby that gets up in the middle of the night. Our first hang over after Amelia was born made me realized, my drinking days were over. You can't nurse a headache and feed a queasy stomach while trying to take care of a child. Well maybe you can, but I feel horrible.
So when we go to a party and Amelia is with a baby sitter and I feel like I'm on a roll, by the second drink, my daughter's face pops in to my head, just like my mother's face would pop up when I was about to pass third base with a guy.
Plus, kids just know when you have left them for a night out of town. That is the day she wakes up the earliest and we have to drag our tired butts out of bed. So I don't encourage drinking and parenting at all but do not take my glass of wine away. It's all I've got. If you can, check out the article in today's NYT Sunday Styles Section: "A Heroin of Cocktail Moms Sobers Up".